"The time is meow!"

"Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove) 10/03/2016 at 21:43 • Filed to: Decision 2016

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My daughter brought this to my attention today. There is an alternative. Not sure how many states in which he’s on the ballot, though.

From that well-known political rag, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! :

1. Yes, he’s really running for President (he’s registered with the Federal Election Commission).

2. His !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! includes the Affordable Cat Act (ACA, of course), environmental protection, space exploration, gay cat marriage, and the legalization of catnip.

3. No, Limberbutt’s presidential run isn’t illegal, or even unconstitutional. Ever the source of loopholes, Article II, Section I of the U.S. Constitution states “no person, except a natural born citizen […] shall be eligible to the office of President.” As a lifelong resident of Louisville, Kentucky, Limberbutt is as good a natural citizen as any. Still unconvinced? The Constitution’s inclusion of the word “person” could be a cause for concern. Technically, though, the Founding Fathers should have used the word “human” for increased accuracy, which means that Limberbutt is still in the clear.

4. There could be one, tiny detail that might make Limberbutt ineligible for the Commander-in-Chief’s role, which constitutionally requires candidates to be, minimum, 35 years of age. Limberbutt is only seven — but , !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , he’s 44. That makes him one year older than John F. Kennedy at his time of inauguration, and more than qualified in the age department.

5. And no, the feline favorite isn’t even the first of his kind, considering that his current animal kingdom competition is a !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! and a crawfish. A pet running for office isn’t even an original phenomenon. His precursors include !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! that ran for president in 1968 and !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! .

Okay, okay. So we know that Limberbutt won’t really ever hold office, but that doesn’t invalidate his actual running. His human Emilee McCubbins, 18, and her friend, Isaac Weiss, 17, thought it would be humorous to enlist Limberbutt with the Federal Election Commission, and were surprised when they began receiving letters about possible volunteering and canvassing opportunities that could help Limberbutt make it to the White House. McCubbins told !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! that she had even been contacted by a lawyer, who wanted to represent her cat on his political campaign. Weiss added, “It does not appear that they know that he is indeed a cat.”

McCubbins and Weiss don’t encourage people to vote for Limberbutt, come November — they won’t be voting for him, themselves — but the notion of animal candidates might illuminate something bigger about the state of voting culture, modern democracy and political unrest in America.

For the American voters that are exasperated by the state of the 2016 presidential race, Limberbutt “for them, is an outlet to voice their frustrations and have a political discussion with a true outsider and hopeful Washington fat cat,” said Weiss.

Even though Limberbutt won’t see the Oval Office, his slogan resonates with us all as election season moves closer: “The time is meow.”

TheHondaBro > Chariotoflove 10/03/2016 at 21:46

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Has he chosen a running mate? This is my ideal candidate.

Chariotoflove > TheHondaBro 10/03/2016 at 21:58

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That’s a good question. Regardless, you can buy Limberbutt campaign gear , including wiper blade tags. What happened to the Honda?! Is it coming back in time to sport some tags?

Hot Takes Salesman > Chariotoflove 10/03/2016 at 23:13

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Not sure he’ll get as many votes as the political powerhouse, Deez Nutz.

TheHondaBro > Chariotoflove 10/04/2016 at 00:04

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My power steering pump went bulimic.

Chariotoflove > Hot Takes Salesman 10/04/2016 at 10:47

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That’s why he needs a grass roots (catnip roots?) campaign. Not much time for the come from behind win.

Chariotoflove > TheHondaBro 10/04/2016 at 10:48

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Sorry to hear that.